Adhesions is finished, my book
about a girl who finds herself on a seemingly utopian planet. The
science fiction story I've been working on for nearly eight years. The
final final final draft is done (at least until the editors get a hold
of it--IF they do) and I've sent it out to ten agents already. (I know.
Ten is not enough.)
One agent responded with interest.
But now I'm not sure if it really was interest. I remember querying her
(obviously; it was only a week ago), but her agency's website said to
send only a query. Like an idiot, I didn't look at the agent's own
submission guidelines, in which she asks for the first five pages. I did
not send those five pages. She responded to my query requesting them,
and like a fool, I mistook it for interest in my book.
But
could it still be interest? If she didn't like the idea of the story,
if she didn't like my query, she could have responded with a rejection;
instead she asked for the five pages I omitted. If she wasn't
interested, would she have bothered?
These circling
ideas are nauseating. I've waited two days so far for her response (and I
totally understand that she has other emails to sort through; I am not a
priority), and two days may not seem like a lot, but try holding your
breath for 48 hours. Try to focus on something else when your stomach is
half sickened with anxiety, half cautious with optimism. Try sleeping
while waiting for a dream to potentially come true.
Waiting... waiting... waiting...
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