A response to choosing an agent over myself.

I've been getting a lot of negative feedback for choosing old-fashioned publishing as opposed to self-publishing. Everyone will tell me it's not negative and I cannot count how many times I've heard, "I mean, it's your decision, I'm not telling you what to choose! I don't really care either way!" But if they didn't really care, then they would stop bringing it up and bringing it up.


This is my permanent response to everyone who thinks I should take the easy way out and click a button that serves as publication (not that I have ANYTHING against self-publishing, it's just not something I would personally do as my first move):


"It's so much easier."
I'm sorry I'm up for a challenge.

"You can design your own cover."
All of you know I'm really into art. However, my style is not good for book covers. I can't do graphic-like pictures or photography and all my own designs for a book cover would be terrible unless it's a graphic novel. Which it's not.
And besides, that totally takes away the excitement of seeing your cover for the first time (very rarely does an author hate the cover of their book; it's like a parent hating their child's face).

"It's a lot faster; a whole lot less waiting!"
Yeah, I know I'm impatient. Less patient than 80% of the world even. (Probably not.) But do you know how much of my life is spent waiting? I am SO used to it. I can't even list all the things I'm currently waiting for: Divergent #3, Unravel Me, Mark of Athena, Catching Fire the movie, Clockwork Princess, The Evolution of Mara Dyer, and the list goes on. And on. And on.
Waiting, in that respect, means nothing to me.

"No rejections."
Rejections have never bothered or hindered me in any way.
In fact if you were to watch my daily life, I celebrate every time I get a new one.

"But then you wouldn't have to deal with all those changes they'll make to your book!"
Aaand here is the biggest issue. The infamous changes to the manuscript by the agents and the editors and the publishers (especially the editors). Here is the thing: I don't mind the idea of them ripping apart my story and changing it. The fact that some might even be willing to read it as it is now is overwhelming. I am a novice. These people, however long they've been in the publishing industry (be it one year or twenty), have been there longer than I have. They know what my book would be missing, what wouldn't be needed, the things that need changing. Getting published is a very practical thing. It is ultimately about how many copies you can sell. It's a job, and sometimes it's a risky job. If your book doesn't sell, that's (A LOT OF) time and money wasted. Agents and editors know the types of things books would need in order to get decent publicity. For example, the changes made to Twilight (which was originally called Forks) were probably the very reason those books became best-sellers. Simple things like that make it easy for me to trust agents and editors over myself.

The choice to make those changes are still ultimately up to me. Cassandra Clare, while trying to publish City of Bones, heard back from an agent who wanted to make her characters older. She declined, feeling her characters were just the right ages, and looked for interest from a new agent. She is now a #1 NYT best-selling author and City of Bones is being made into a movie. So it's not like writers are forced to make changes they don't want to.

On a final note, I would also like to say (and I don't know how many times I've had to say this--I REALLY want to get it into all your heads so you'll stop pestering me with everything) if I self-publish now and decide to do it the old-fashioned way later, it does not look good in a query letter (unless I become very successful like Amanda Hocking, but that is unlikely). Whether it's true or not, self-publishing gives the impression of failed tries in the past. It is more often than not the thing people turn to when they cannot land an agent. There is not a single ounce of desire in my bones that seeks self-publishing. It requires less experience, less excitement, less emotion in general, and honestly.. it seems like such a boring path to take.

I realize it's not that way every time. Kiera Cass self-published her first novel, The Siren, and then went through an agent to publish her next book, The Selection, and she is now among the best-sellers. However that's one of those rare cases that I doubt I would fall into. I am happy with my decision to old-fashioned-publish, and nothing can make me change my mind. I'm sorry to all the people who would rather see me do it the easy way. But that way is just not meant for me.